doodles from French class (via goddess-river)
Sensual love blog ❤❤
HOW TO STAY IN LOVE:
1. Tell your partner that you love them every day. You are not only reminding them, you are primarily reminding yourself. They say that the people who say ‘I love you’ the most are the happiest. And they’re right. Get creative: find more ways to say it. I love you. Je t’aime. Te amo. My love. My one and only. Love you. Te quiero.
2. Don’t forget to have more low-key dates now and then. Sure, going to a fancy hotel restaurant is nice, but the next day you might be aware of all the crystals missing from your chandelier. There’s a certain comfort in picking up your loved one from the airport or eating at a nearby food court. It’s like saying, ‘Hey, you turn a regular experience in to an exciting one. With you, there’s no such thing as unhappy.’
3. The best moment to consolidate your relationship is when our loved one is going through a difficult time. For some, that is a time of high tension, but it really doesn’t have to be. When your partner is down, you learn to make their life brighter from the inside instead of trying to change external factors. You can’t control the fact that they got fired from their job or that their uncle passed away—but you can control what you bring to their life. What better excuse to be a bundle of sunshine?
4. Make cheating as unthinkable as incest. If you are truly in love, you will not be able to kiss someone else without tasting your loved one’s tears as they stain your lips. You will not be able to take your clothes off with someone else without feeling like a field ripped bare to its soil. Make cheating a dealbreaker for you and assume that it is for your partner too.
5. Make their desires your own. If they want to go to college in a different state, don’t sabotage them. If they fantasize about you in a certain way, turn their desires to reality. If they like how you look in a dress and you prefer jeans, wear dresses more often. You don’t have to change yourself in order to make compromises. You don’t have to lose yourself while trying to find your loved one.
6. See their side of the story. Even if it’s 2 a.m. and they’re accusing you of things you never thought you were capable of doing, sit quiet for a moment and listen to what they’re actually saying. Let go of your defensive wall and think about the impact your actions has on your loved one. Always empathize.
7. Give your loved one random presents. If you’re going to the mall, pick up a flirty gift. If you’re on vacation, buy them a souvenir that means something to them. If you’re going to Starbucks, order their favorite drink. Little gestures go a long way.
8. Dream about the future—but realistically. Don’t tell your loved one you can’t wait to get married after five months, but give them hints that you’re committed. Examples can be making plans for your anniversary, preparing surprises for Valentine’s Day, and letting them know you want to go to the next step. ‘I know we’ve slept together, but you’ve never stayed the night. I’d like to try that.’ It’s not about going fast—it’s about going slow but doing so with passion.
9. Spice things up constantly. Keep both yourself and your partner on your tiptoes by going to new places, trying new positions, changing up your dynamics, using new idioms, etc. Put the two of you in new territory so that you can feel like you’re always learning something new about each other. This way, it will be difficult to ever feel like strangers, because you will have gotten accustomed to watching each other grow, change, and be exposed to new situations.
10. Get to know where they come from. It’s useless trying to love someone without considering their family, background, and past experiences. Slowly break away any boundaries between the two of you and let yourself see even the ugliest parts of your loved one. A realistic relationship is almost guaranteed to function while a superficial one isn’t. You can’t love someone independently of their environment.
"What were you wearing?"
I wore a red dress to work today. It has a zipper at either side of my chest that can unzip and reveal a thin strip of skin. A coworker, without warning, tried pulling at the zipper and when it wouldn’t zip, instead revealed a good portion of my collarbone and shoulder as well as my bra strap. An hour later, the same coworker came up and told me to not wear clothes with zippers because he’ll go right ahead and unzip them. I shot back that unzipping me without my permission is sexual harassment. Apparently a manager heard and berated my coworker. At the end of my shift, my coworker told me that my little comment got him in trouble and that he no longer feels comfortable saying anything to me other than “hello” and “goodbye.”
I am supposed to feel guilty for pointing out that he can’t lay his fucking hands on me.
So I wore the infamous dress at work yesterday and ANOTHER MALE COWORKER DECIDED TO PULL AT ONE OF MY FUCKING ZIPPERS.
We were surrounded by other (also male) coworkers (that did nothing) and I swatted his hand away while promptly informing him that he didn’t have permission to touch me.
He then asked, since he knows I cosplay, if it would be any different if I wore a revealing costume. I gave him a dirty look and told him that no matter what *I* decide to wear, no one is allowed “to lay a finger on me unless they want my foot up their ass.”
Being that I’m quite professional at work, they were all surprised by my language and the ferocity with which I spat my promise.
you fucking go girl
Had I tried to pull at those zippers (which I probably would have cause they’re funny little zippers) - I bet I wouldn’t have been scolded. Because I’m a woman. And since I’m a straight woman, there would have been no sexual thought at all in my doing. Would I have gotten a lecture on sexual harrassment? Highly unlikely. Now, I am very easygoing with men in general. I don’t fear them. I don’t feel threatened by them. I don’t assume that everyone automatically wants to have sex with me just because I’m pretty and have female parts. Why? Because I know men can joke around and have a laugh without wanting to immediately jump you. I think society has gone too far in animalizing men. I don’t get many male customers at work, but outside of my workplace, in my circle of aquaintances, through my hobbies - I get thrown together with men in their 40s and 50s a lot and I have never even remotely felt harrassed sexually. Some women out there need to calm down and realize that men are not 100% sexual predators.
As for the lady with the red dress. If you’re not okay with it, tell them. But at least tell the manager that everything was a misunderstanding.
I’m happy for you in that you’ve never really felt sexually harassed but I stand by what I said. And it wasn’t a misunderstanding. Someone pulled on a zipper and showed a lot of my skin without warning or permission. Doesn’t matter that they were both men in the instances because it’s my dress on my body which is mine.
What mostly pissed me off was what they said afterward. One guy said he’d remove all future zippers and the other asked if touching me was fine if I wore revealing cosplay.
I’m not a manhater. I don’t think every man is a rapist. I know that people in general like to joke around, yet none of my male friends would ever lay a finger on me without permission. Hell, even my boyfriend waited for explicit consent to just kiss me. So it doesn’t matter to me if “guys like to joke around” because everyone needs to know about what boundaries cannot be crossed. Had a woman said either of those things to me, I would have put her in her place. And her place would be a safe distance away from my body.
Your first time is NOT supposed to hurt
You are NOT supposed to bleed
If you bleed, that is NOT your hymen being ‘popped’, it is a tear due to lack of sexual arousal and natural lubrication.
This is all a MYTH perpetrated by men so they don’t have to make sure you are comfortable and sufficiently aroused enough before you have sex with them. It is an excuse to disregard and hurt you.
I just really want women to know this.
I want this!!!